Pink Lake (or a short lesson in meromictic lakes)

I went for a hike today with a friend of mine around Pink Lake in the Gatineau Park. I hadn’t done this trail before – which is an easy 2-km loop around the water. In order to protect the delicate ecology of this lake, the trail is very well-maintained with lots of boardwalk sections and wooden steps.

One distinctive aspect of the lake is that is one of 16 meromictic lakes in North America. In most lakes, water mixes completely during spring and fall - due to such things as water density and air temperature and wind - evenly distributing nutrients and oxygen. But in meromictic lakes, the waters of different levels of the lake don’t mix.

Pink Lake is in a uniquely sheltered position with steep hills all around it protecting it from the wind and bowl-like shape with a small surface area. Because the waters do not mix, the bottom 7 metres have no oxygen in which thrive an anaerobic prehistoric bacteria which uses sulphur instead of oxygen.

Apart from the anaerobic bacteria, nothing can survive at the bottom of the lake. So anything which sinks into the depths of Pink Lake will not decompose. This is a historian’s dream since analysis of the 10,000 year-old sludge in the bottom of the lake can reveal such thing as the history of the surrounding ecosystems and the changing levels of lead in the air.

Another distinctive thing about Pink Lake is that it’s fed only by runoff water. Like most of the surrounding lakes, it was once part of the Atlantic Ocean which left pockets of water behind when it retreated, most of which desalinated in the course of about 30 years since they are fed by rivers and streams. But Pink Lake took more than 3,000 years to desalinate – a process so slow that the stickleback, a salt-water fish was able to evolve and adapt.

One interesting thing about the sticklebacks is their unusual mating behaviour. Males construct a nest from vegetation held together by secretions from their kidneys and attract females to their nests. The female will lay her eggs inside the nest after which the male fertilizes them and guards them until they hatch.

World Photography Day

If you haven’t taken a picture today, quick, go and do it! Today is World Photography Day and people all over the world are celebrating by taking photographs.

August 19 commemorates the birth of the daguerreotype – the first commercially successful permanent photographic print. Invented in France by Louis Jacques Mandé Daguerre (shown in daguerreotype photo), the original process used a direct-positive process to create an image on copper that had been plated with a thin coat of highly polished silver, sensitized over iodine, developed with hot mercury, fixed with salt, and toned with gold chloride. This process was not only expensive and time-consuming, it was dangerous. But it was still an instant hit and almost an over-night sensation. The amount of detail which could be rendered in a daguerreotype image is still impressive even by today’s standard of high definition.

On August 19, 1839, the French Academy of Sciences publically released the daguerreotype photo methodology – ushering in not only a new way of permanently recording images, but also of making art. Within a decade daguerreotype studios had popped up in Europe and North America, capturing images of celebrities, political figures and members of the public. But since exposure time for early daguerreotypes ranged from 3 to 15 minutes, the process and product was very different from the instant images we produce today.

As I write, V is taking pictures of the cat. Although I intended to go around with my camera today and take some shots, I didn’t actually start taking photos till this evening. One is of the lovely bouquet of hydrangeas which V brought home today (it being our 4th anniversary, the anniversary whose flower is the hydrangea).

The other is of M looking through the window at me when I was outside looking for things to shoot. Miya is by far the primary subject of any photo taken around here (such that we really need to start making effort to take pictures of other things).

So tonight, in addition to thanking my husband for four lovely years of marriage, I’d also like to thank M. Daguerre for his role in allowing us today to record the images and memories of our lives.

Crane party!

We were invited to a ‘crane party’ tonight – a party to say good-bye to a gigantic crane (the construction apparatus not the bird) that’s been towering above our friends’ house since November. A new condo building is being constructed almost directly behind their house, so a crane has been swinging over their block for the past 9 months, hoisting construction materials and even porta-potties. Apparently some merlins nested temporarily in the structure.

Our friends have a little girl very close in age to Miya who has been a big fan of this crane. Hard to beat having your own backyard construction site when you’re a toddler. But the crane is being dismantled on Saturday, so tonight our hosts gave a tribute to the crane and the entertainment it brought to their lives. We raised glasses and sippy cups in a toast. One guest composed an impromptu song (‘The crane is going away’ sung to the tune of ‘The farmer in the dell’).

At the end of the party – after delicious rice rolls, roasted veggies, corn on the cob, salads and sangria – we had a crane parade to the foot of the crane – which basically was some tired toddlers racing each other down the sidewalk, but calling it a parade was a good way to transition from party to going-home-time.

Funny story about this crane (I’ll get some details wrong since this is a story passed on to me and I don’t know those involved directly)... Because this crane was so big, the radius of its arm extended beyond the construction site. The development company informed the homeowners who lived directly behind the site that the crane would be operating above their houses, and to compensate them for their inconvenience, offered some amount like $500.

This worked on all the neighbours except for one very savvy individual who knew his rights to the vertical space directly above his home and refused to grant permission for the company to trespass this unless they gave him something like $20,000 (I wish I could remember the actual amounts). The company baulked of course, but ended up having to give in. Gotta love a story where the little guy wins!

Relief slow to come in East Africa

Oxfam Canada blames donor fatigue for the slow pace of donations to aid the millions of starving people in East Africa – the majority of whom are children.

The United Nations has thus far raised only $1.1 billion of the $2.4 billion requested for famine relief. More than 12 million people are in urgent need of food following severe drought and conflict. In Somalia, it’s estimated that half the population needs food aid.

It’s not that Canadians aren’t donating. We have given about $20 million so far to registered charities such as the Oxfam and UNICEF – meaning that the government of Canada has matched these amounts. The government will continue to match aid donations until Sept 16. They funds provided through the government matching program go into a wider funding pool, not specifically to the program or organization to which a donation was made.

For my blog gift last month, V donated money to the Canadian Red Cross, and I made a donation to Medecins san frontiers (MSF). Both of these organizations are registered Canadian charities, so our gift will be matched by the government. Importantly for me, both of these organizations are highly respected in the field for being neutral in conflict and egalitarian in their aid delivery.

If you are interested in how donated money is being spent, organizations will provide breakdowns on their program funding. The CBC is also doing some analysis of where money for drought relief is going. For example, the World Food Program has spent $25.5 million to fee 11.5 million people. Oxfam has spent $3.75 million to provide water, sanitation services, and work projects such as promoting health and protecting livestock. Care Canada has targeted their $3.75 million on severely malnourished children under five and pregnant or lactating women.

GiveWell, an independent non-profit charity evaluator, notes that this famine in East Africa is very challenging for aid organizations – citing such factors as the hostile militant group al-Shabaab’s control of famine-stricken territories. However, they cautiously say that donations from individuals are more helpful in situations like this as compared to the 2010 Haiti earthquake.

Caravaggio at the National Art Gallery

V and I went out tonight on an anniversary date (a few days early). Since we are members of the National Art Gallery – along with nearly every other museum in town – we took advantage of their ‘members only’ evening which included a screening of the Caravaggio exhibit featuring more than 40 paintings by Caravaggio and other painters inspired by him. This is the first time Caravaggio’s paintings have been shown outside of Italy.

I learned tonight that Caravaggio was an Italian artist who “changed the course of art history” by becoming one of the first painters to combine dramatic pose and expression with naturalist lighting and details.

The paintings were all very bold and much larger than life. Expressions, postures and gestures were dramatic. Many of the images dealt with emotionally-charged subjects, such as Judith beheading Holofernes. Interesting, in a few cases several paintings addressing the same subject were hung side by side so that we could see how different artists depicted the same subject as their contemporaries. One might focus on the physicality of the act, another on the vulnerability. A little gruesome, but still interesting.

But V and I didn’t actually stay a long time at the gallery. We likened our tour of the Caravaggio exhibit to a heavy Italian dinner of rich sauces and hearty pasta. One fills up quickly and doesn’t have room for more.

After half an hour among the dramatic paintings of Caravaggio and his followers, I was full.

This is one of the nice things about having memberships at galleries. If I pay a one-time admission to a gallery or museum, I feel an obligation to make the most of it and visit as much as possible, even after I have passed the point of absorbing what I am seeing. But when a gallery is free, or if I have a membership, I enjoy passing through and staying long enough to be inspired, but not so long that my eyes glaze over.

Tonight was a perfect example of how I love using our membership. We strolled through the exhibit at our leisure and when we were sated we headed out for drinks and dinner. A lovely anniversary date.

Garlic Festival

Yesterday we drove out to Carp (a cute little town despite its strange name), for their 12th annual Garlic Festival (and our third consecutive visit). It’s a dusty fairground rimmed with small tents where local farmers sell many varieties of garlic, displayed in braids, rings, bunches and baskets.

Before my first visit to a garlic festival, I had no idea how many varieties of garlic there were, or how weak the garlic was that we’d been eating up till then. Organic, local garlic is infinitely tastier and juicier than the generic China-grown bulbs typically found at our Superstore.

But the Garlic Festival in Carp was more than just garlic bulbs. V couldn’t resist buying some garlic ice cream (which mostly tasted like vanilla but had just a faint, inoffensive aroma of garlic on top). There were garlic spreads, dressings, pottery garlic holders... as well as other local garden produce like corn, beans, zucchini and tomatoes.

We weren’t able to watch many of the events, but had we been there at the right time we could have seen a garlic string braid demonstration which would have been very cool to learn. There were also sessions on growing garlic, using scapes, and cooking with garlic.

And much to Miya’s delight, there was Crash the Clown who was making balloon animals for kids. He gave Miya a little ladybug that he said was to be worn as a bracelet – but the part that went around her wrist was super tight, so I used her hairclips to turn it into a ‘fascinator'.

I think Crash should have been sharing his profits with Miya for the rest of the festival, since by traipsing around the fairgrounds with a ladybug in her hair, she managed to prompt nearly every kid we passed to ask for their own balloon.

Last year we bought some bulbs to plant and V put them in the ground in the fall and harvested them a few days ago. Not a bumper crop, but still a pretty good showing of a few different varieties. With our own harvest and the 30-some bulbs V picked up yesterday, hopefully we have enough to see us through to next August.

100 Random Questions (xi)

90. Are you a morning person or a night owl?
Honestly, it feels like since having a kid I am forever sleep deprived, so I am neither one nor the other. But that said, I’m most productive in the morning (especially if I’ve had a good night’s sleep) but peter out during the day and have learned that I can’t do important or creative writing in the evening.

91. Can you touch your nose with your tongue?
I’m very proud to say that yes, I can.

92. Can you close your eyes and raise your eyebrows?
I would look in the mirror to check, but my eyes are closed.

93. Do you have pets?
We have two cats that we got in 2006. They were exclusively indoor cats until about two weeks ago and they are now loving the freedom of being outdoor cats – especially our gib (neutered tomcat) who likes to spend his nights outdoors and his days passed out on his back on our bed, sleeping off his untold escapades.

94. How many rings before you answer the phone?
Depends on how close I am to the phone and if I can find it. If it’s my cell, I often forget to have the ringer on.

95. What are some of the different jobs that you have had in your life?
One of my first business ventures was when I was about 12 years-old when we were living in Nepal and I was put in touch with a man who made peanut-butter and needed a distributor to the expat community. I became this distributor, taking orders from expats across Nepal for crunchy or smooth and shipping out pb. I had stacks of oily plastic jars of pb in my bedroom. Smelled very nutty.

Since that promising start, I have gone on to such illustrious jobs as chicken pickin’, carrot cutting, baby sitting, lawn mowing, garbage hauling, camp counselling, canoe instructing, wine serving, cabbage hoeing, pea picking... I have worked for the Canadian Armed Forces, Multiple Sclerosis Society of Canada, Canadian Crossroads for International Development, Canadian Conference of the Arts, Residence of the British High Commissioner, Domus restaurant, Voluntary Services Overseas, Statistics Canada, Starbucks...

100 Random Questions (x)

79. Where would you retire to?
It’s hard to answer this question since a) I plan to never really retire since I’ll continue to write as long as I have ideas in my head and b) it’s very hard to predict where life will take me.

80. What kind of car do you drive?
We drive an aging, rapidly deteriorating Honda CRV.

81. What are your best physical features?
I’m particularly fond of the arch of my left foot.

82. What are your best characteristics?
V says my compassion for humanity.

83. If you could go anywhere in the world on vacation where would you go?
I’ve been thinking lately about contacting my friend who lives near Barcelona and asking if she could find a little place that we could rent for a few weeks next summer. I’m not too big on tourist destinations, so love the idea of finding a little place somewhere different and interesting where we can relax and explore. Renting a place in France, Switzerland, Cuba, Thailand... also quite enticing.

84. What kind of books do you like to read?
I like to have a mix on the go at all times – something fiction, some autobiographies/biographies/letters, something French, something non-fiction and educational. Ramping up my CanLit reading lately too.

85. Where would you want to retire to?
Obviously whoever wrote these questions did not have someone like V as an attentive proof-reader.

86. What is your favorite time of the day?
I like coming home to Miya at the end of day, especially on days when I come back at 4:00 and can take her to the park or on errands with me. I also like reading stories with her before bedtime.

87. Where did you grow up?
I grew up in Nepal and moved to the prairies when I was 12.

88. How far away from your birthplace do you live now?
I was born in Vancouver – so about 3538 km.

89. What are you reading now?
I am reading Dance on the Earth by Margaret Laurence, Iris and Friends by John Bayley, Select Letters of Margaret Laurence and Adele Wiseman and La force de l’age by Simone de Beauvoir.

100 Random Questions (ix)

69. What is the last movie that you saw at the cinema?
I have no idea, it’s been that long.

70. Do you sing in the shower?
Occasionally.

71. Which store would you choose to max out your credit card?
My answer has not changed since responding to this same question at #39.

72. What do you do most when you are bored?
I’m someone who’s rarely bored – esp. since I have to-do lists and dream lists that are miles long. I don’t take enough time to simply do nothing, take the time to be bored. It’s actually very creatively important and I should seek it out more often.

73. What do you do for a living?
‘For a living’ is odd to me – to live I breathe, move, eat, love... but I suppose the question is getting at what I do to earn a pay cheque. Well, in my typical fashion I am currently juggling 3 part-time jobs and trying to squeeze other things on top like child-raising and writing a book.

74. Do you love your job?
What I love to do is to write. What parts of my work are writing, I love. Other parts, I enjoy to varying degrees

75. What did you want to be when you grew up?
I think that changed a lot over the years. When I was really little I wanted to be a “plain mommy” and later it was things like teacher and nurse. Growing up in Nepal I wasn’t exposed to a lot of professions. I think it was probably around the age of 12 or 13 that I began to know more clearly that I wanted to be a writer.

76. If you could have any job, what would you want to do/be?
Sigh. These questions are getting redundant as are my answers.

77. Which came first the chicken or the egg?
Who knows? (Although V says the egg came first by a long shot because there were things laying eggs well before chickens came along.)

78. How many keys on your key ring?
2. It’s a very sad key ring. I don’t even have a copy of the key to my front door.

100 Random Questions (viii)

55. Do you touch-type?
Yup.V just covered my eyes to make sure.
I can also touch type on a French keyboard.

56. What's under your bed?
A tripod, some shoes, random socks, a box of papers, and so much dust and cat hair that we could make our own golem. Maybe two.

57. Do you believe in love at first sight?
Attraction, sure. But love is not love without knowledge and understanding.

58. Think fast, what do you like right now?
V asked just now, ‘would you like some wine.’ I said yes. So that answers that.

59. Where were you on Valentine's day?
Probably at home doing dishes or laundry or something that effect.

60. What time do you get up?
7:45. I know. I’m very lucky to get to sleep in that late.

61. What was the name of your first pet?
When I was growing up we had a dog named Cobbler, so named because as a puppy she would gnaw on shoes. She was a fantastic dog – a cross between a purebred Scots Terrier and the local Nepali mutt nicknamed Foxface by the expats – lots of personality and a fantastic temperament and our pet for around 10 years.

62. Who is the second to last person to call you?
Hard to remember. Guessing it was an associate at a bank.

63. Is there anything going on this weekend?
We’re going to a wedding on Saturday and a local garlic festival on Sunday.

64. How are you feeling right now?
Full of Vietnamese take-out.

65. What do you think about the most?
Miya. Work. V. House. Friends.

(V says he thinks about the cats wearing little top hats and dancing with canes.)

66. What time do you get up in the morning?
Is this to differentiate between what time I get up from my desk? from the couch? from the table?? What odd questions.

67. If you had A Big Win in the Lottery, how long would you wait to tell people?
If it was a really big win, I wouldn’t have much of a choice since the Lottery company would notify the press.

68. Who would you tell first?
My husband.

Prisoners' Justice Day

Today is Prisoners’ Justice Day, an annual day of memorial, vigil and protest when prisoners and supporters remember the men and women who have died inside prisons. On this day, thousands of inmates around the world refuse to work or eat in a show of solidarity with the brothers and sisters who have died behind bars.

In the decade between 1998 and 2008, 532 inmates died in federal custody in Canada from a range of known causes including natural death, suicide, accident and homicide. Correctional Investigator Howard Sapers argues that Canada’s federal prisons are more crowded and more tense, which contributes to an increase in violence and death behind bars. For example, from 2009-10 to 2010-11, both inmate injuries and self-harm rose by more than 60%.

Prisoners’ Justice Day is historically a day in which prisoners and their supporters draw attention to prisoner maltreatment and lobby for positive change. The day began to commemorate the death of Eddie Nalon who bled to death from suicide in the segregation unit of Millhaven Maximum Security Prison in Bath, Ontario on August 10, 1974. He was serving a life sentence at the time and had spent the previous two months in “the hole”. An inquest into his death found that the call buttons in his and other solitary cells had been deactivated by guards.

On the first anniversary of Eddie’s death, August 10, 1975, prisoners at Millhaven refused to work, went on a one-day hunger strike, and held a memorial service even though they faced the punishment of solitary confinement.

On May 21, 1976, Robert (Bobby) Landers, a prison rights activist, also died in solitary confinement at Millhaven. Despite his repeated requests for medical aid due to a heart condition, Landers was left unattended in solitary confinement. An inquest into his death determined that he died from a heart attack.

On August 10, 1976, prisoners in Millhaven again went on a hunger strike – this time to commemorate both Eddie Nalon and Bobby Landers and to protest the lack of implementation of recommendations following the inquests into Eddie’s death, as well as the practice of solitary confinement. Low-key peaceful protests have been since held annually in prisons across Canada.

100 Random Questions (vii)

46. Who was the last person you ate dinner with?
V was out playing ultimate tonight, so I ate an early dinner with Miya.

47. Is the glass half empty or half full?
My glass of wine is half empty, but my water glass half full.

48. What's the farthest-away place you've been?
Farthest from where? From where I am right now? I checked on a site and Ottawa to Kathmandu, Nepal is 11,650 km, to Christchurch, New Zealand is 14,747 and to Sydney, Australia is 15,852. So I guess Sydney wins.

49. When's the last time you ate a homegrown tomato?
Yesterday V brought in two purple cherry tomatoes from the garden, but he and Miya gobbled them up. I think the last one I ate was about a week ago. We have a lot of green tomatoes on the vine right now, so I’ll have plenty of opportunities soon.

50. Have you ever won a trophy?
In high school my basketball team won every tournament we played in during my senior year, and we took home the provincial gold for our level. That was by far the most successful team I’ve ever been on.

51. Are you a good cook?
I consider myself a competent cook. I can prepare healthy meals quickly, but am not one for carefully prepared, gastronomically-advanced dishes – I leave that to V.

52. Do you know how to pump your own gas?
What sort of woman do you take me for? I pull up to a pump, climb daintily out of the car in my high heels and short skirt, and start pouting. If necessary, I will cry a little. Eventually someone will take pity on me and fill my gas tank while I watch admiringly and buff my nails.

53. If you could meet any one person (from history or currently alive), who would it be?
Didn’t we do this one already? Oh yeah, that was lunch.

Well, now that I’ve had lunch with Leonard Cohen, I suppose I would like to meet with Margaret Laurence, my favourite female author.

54. Have you ever had to wear a uniform to school?
Not unless you count sports uniforms.

100 Random Questions (vi)

37. If you could eat lunch with one famous person, who would it be?
Does this assume that the famous person would be interested in talking to me? I mean, I could ask to have lunch with world leaders like Obama or Ban Ki-Moon, but would they actually want to have a conversation? I’d have a hundred and one questions to ask, but why would they bother to give me an honest answer?

So I think I will rule out politicians. I’m also not too interested in Hollywood and television celebrities, or the people routinely featured in the tabloids… so that brings me to artists… and I would absolutely love to have lunch with Leonard Cohen. I would probably be too in awe to talk or eat, but even just to have a brief conversation with him, to hear that voice speaking to me…

38. Who sent the last text message you received?
Miya’s nanny.

39. Which store would you choose to max out your credit card?
I’m not a big shopper, so maxing out my card would probably have to done on big ticket items. If I had to limit it to one store, I’d maybe pick a place like Home Depot so we could finish our home renos, or a furniture/appliance store in order to re-do our kitchen or bathroom…

40. What time is bed time?
For my daughter, 8:00. For me, between 10:00 and 11:00.

41. Have you ever been in a beauty pageant?
No and I never wanted to be.

42. How many tattoos do you have?
None.

43. If you don't have any, have you ever thought of getting one?
There were a few times in my life when I wanted to get one for a significant event, but usually something prevented me and I don’t regret it now. The tattoos I might have got on those occasions, those perhaps I might regret now.

44. What did you do for your last birthday?
I can’t remember.

45. Do you carry a donor card?
No, but I have registered online with the Ontario Ministry of Health, which is more secure than a donor card and accessible should it ever be needed.

Books: The Sacrifice

The Sacrifice, by Adele Wiseman (Toronto: McClelland & Stewart, 1956) is a story of faith, ambition, family and, as the name suggests, of sacrifice.

Written by Winnipeg-born author Adele Wiseman, a close friend of Margaret Laurence, the book is set in a Jewish immigrant community of an anonymous Canadian city. At the centre of the story is Abraham the immigrant butcher, a stubborn, devout patriarch who brings his wife Sarah and son Isaac to the hope of a new life. As the names suggests, Wiseman is telling a story that deals with biblical themes and profound questions.

“One of the things I want to do,” she'd said, “is explore the absolutely best reason for doing the worst thing.”

What are the worst things humans can do, and what are the motivations which drive them? These are the questions Wiseman explores – and she does so with masterful character description that presents people in their frail humanity, their limitations and flaws, but also their dignity and heroic potential.

One of the strengths of this book, which won the Governor General’s Award, is the dialogue and the authentic voices Wiseman gives to her characters, even the secondary ones. The writing is careful, even too loaded at times, but vivid and poignant. The plot advances slowly; we are aware of a tapestry unfolding before us and of the rich complexity of narrative weaving it together.

This novel raises questions of devotion, loyalty, faith and sacrifice, yet leaves them to be answered by the reader. Wiseman is compassionate in her character portrayal but uncompromisingly real. There are no saints and angels here, only people struggling through a troubled world.

The main protagonist, Abraham, is driven by his need to understand and interpret divine guidance. Faced with exceptionally cruel circumstances, his faith is stretched to the edge of reason, and beyond.

“When a human being cries out to you, no matter who it is, don’t judge him, don’t harm him, or you turn away from God Himself,” he says in his final understanding.

This book is a portrait of the human cries and the downfall of a man so obsessed with seeking the voice of God that he cannot hear them.

100 Random Questions (v)

31. What was the last thing you bought?
A sandwich and a bottle of water from the Tim’s in Smith’s Falls.

32. Have you ever ridden on a motorbike?
Yes. Once, I was with my friend Jenny en route to Timbuktu by local bus. We’d asked the driver to let us know when we reached the town of Sevaré since we going to be spending the night there before continuing on. The driver called out that this was our stop so we grabbed our stuff and hopped off the bus. It was just starting to pull away when I realized I’d left my camera on board. I took off running down the street after it.

A young man on a motorbike asked Jenny what had happened and she quickly told him. He pulled up and said ‘hop on’. I did, in the process badly scalding my left calf on the exhaust pipe. He had a big backpack on his back, which I held on to as we sped off after the bus. We caught up with the bus when it stopped to let off more passengers. I climbed on and recovered my camera. Later I discovered a large burn blister on my leg.

33. Would you go bungee jumping or sky diving?
Bungee jumping is not something I would choose to do, but I’m not ruling it out. Sky diving I am slightly more open too, but don’t think it’s something I would seek out. Not too fond of heights.

34. Do you have a garden?
We have a small vegetable garden that V had done quite well with. For dinner tonight we had fresh cucumber and zucchini from our garden – along with other fresh local vegetables from the farmer’s market. Unfortunately the local squirrels are big fans of our few veggies and often get to them first.

35. Do you really know all the words to your national anthem?
Of the first verse in the English version, yes.

36. What is the first thing you think of when you wake up in the morning?
If I’m woken by my daughter before 7:00 a.m., my first is whether we can get her back to sleep.

100 Random Questions (iv)

21. Would you ever consider living abroad?
A more appropriate question to ask me: would I consider not living abroad again during my lifetime?

I would consider and would say I am not in favour.

22. Does your name make any interesting anagrams?
Nope. Some anagrams I’ve found are: A race giant, A crane gait, Neat cigar, A cat era gin. Sad.

23. Who made the last incoming call on your phone?
The president of the board of directors at my job. He wanted to discuss the annual report I am putting together.

24. What is the last thing you downloaded onto your computer?
Trial version of Adobe InDesign. Loving it.

25. Last time you swam in a pool?
I was in a wading pool with Miya at the park this morning. On Saturdays we do parent and tot swim classes, so that would have been the last time I swam in a pool – although it doesn’t really count as swimming I guess since I’m mostly standing in the water holding Miya. It’s probably been at least a month since I last went to the pool on my own to swim laps.

26. Type of music you like most?
Probably folk or world music.

27. Type of music you dislike most?
Punk rock. I just don’t get it.

28. Are you listening to music right now?
Yep. ‘Le toi de moi’ by Carla Bruni. She’s the wife of French President Nicholas Sarkozy. When I first heard she was a musician I was sceptical – she seemed too much a beautiful celebrity. But I actually really like her music. Listening to her makes me feel like I’m sitting in a little French café sipping a glass of red wine.

29. What color is your bedroom carpet?
No carpet in the bedroom. What odd questions.

30. If you could change something about your home, without worry about expense or mess, what would you do?
Ah, now here could be a long list. I’d finish the bathroom downstairs, wrap our entire foundation in water-proofing and then finally finish the walls, install heated tiling on the basement floor and make a family room down there... and I’m just getting started.

100 Random Questions (iii)

14. What do you think of this quiz?
I am grateful for not having to come up with blog ideas for a few days!

15. What is the last film you saw?
The Social Network.

16. If you could live anywhere in the world, where would you live?
I don’t know if I could pick a place to live permanently and am pretty happy with Ottawa as a home base, but I would like to live in a few other places at least for awhile. Top choices are: India, Nepal, Switzerland, Sweden, Croatia, Reunion, Ghana, Senegal...

17. If you became a multi-millionaire overnight, what would you buy?
I would love to be able to buy a hospital or a school for a community in desperate need. But aware that good intentions don’t necessarily produce good results, I would probably research into a local, community-led development organization I would like support, invest my money in them and perhaps take a role on the board of directors.

I would also like to buy a lovely little townhouse for my mother and hire someone to fix all our nagging home reno projects...

18. Tell me something about you that most people don't know.
Most people do not know that I have very slight dyslexia and when tired mix up letters like b, d and p.

19. If you could change one thing about the world, regardless of guilt or politics, what would you do?
I suppose saying ‘ending human suffering’ would be a bit too facile. What about reversing climate change? Providing adequate clean water to everyone? Stopping the spread of AIDS and diseases like malaria? Ending child mortality? Feeding the hungry? Housing the poor??

But of course coming up with a practical response to any of these problems is not as simple as wishing them away. So it’s unlikely I could find some sort of change that would end suffering from hunger, poverty and disease. But I’d like to think that in my lifetime I’ll contribute in some way to making things better...

20. Do you like to dance?
What an odd sequence of questions – but yes, I love to dance and should do it more often.

100 Random Questions (ii)

7. With the exception of the computer, what can you hear?
Bob Marley signing ‘Could you be love?’ from the stereo. Outside birds are chirping, and the occasional car passes by.

8. When did you last step outside? What were you doing?
I was last outside to take my daughter to the library and the grocery store.

9. Did you dream last night?
I think it was last night, or maybe the night before, that I had this dream that we had moved into a different house. It was rather small and I was moving things around to figure out where everything would fit (all the furniture was all different). I kept discovering new things, like pushing aside carpet and finding out the floor was made of glass. I remembering thinking that I liked the way it looked, but wondered how cold it would be in the winter. I also opened some curtains to find a bunk bed … probably too many conversations about home renos in the evening.

10. Do you remember your dreams?
Logically, this question would have preceded 9 and only if one answered yes to this would one then answer the next question. Having already answered 9, I figured the answer to 10 is a given.

11. When did you last laugh?
I don’t know when I had a good belly laugh, but I do laugh a lot with Miya. It’s very cute to listen to her while she is playing, i.e. “Put the ball in here. Have to move it over. Good idea!” She also sings rather off-key and gets stuck in a loop when she can’t remember the next line of a song so skips back to the start.

12. Do you remember why / at what?
Again, the order of these questions is rather puzzling.

13. What is on the walls of the room you are in?
I’m sitting in the living room. Bookshelves take up much of the wall space, but there is an old oil painting hanging above the fireplace, a batik from Nepal on the wall facing me. To my left hang an African mask and a framed piece of birch bark biting from Saskatchewan.

100 Random Questions (i)

So I’m getting desperate. Looking for blog ideas I typed ‘random questions’ into a Google search and the first hit was a page with 100 random questions. Aha. I now have a blog subject (although readers do have my sincere apologies for the lack of creativity in the resulting blogs – 7 months and counting, sometimes inspiration run dry...)

100 Random Questions
1. Grab the book nearest to you, turn to page 18, and find line 4.

The book nearest me is ‘Connected Parenting: How to Raise a Great Kid’. It’s out on the coffee table because my nanny was interested in looking at it. The sentence starting on pg 18, line 4 reads: “So don’t get frustrated if you’re doing everything you can and your toddler just doesn’t get it.”

That’s actually a rather encouraging, through random, thing to read. As much fun as a two-year old can be, there have also been some struggles lately as she tests the limits and her independence. Rewarding, challenging, tiring... thus is parenting.

2. Stretch your left arm out as far as you can. What can you touch?

This question does not specify the direction in which I to reach my left arm... but reaching around I could touch the book I just set down, my bag of knitting (I’m finishing up a crazy striped sweater for M), the couch I’m sitting on, the curtain behind me, this computer (obviously)... this is boring.

3. Before you started this survey, what were you doing?

I was seeking inspiration on what to blog about.

4. What is the last thing you watched on TV?

Ah, this is too embarrassing to answer. I am ashamed of my tv watching habits and will disclose them only to a priest. And no, it’s not because I’m watching some sort of dirty porn channel, but rather that I watch insipid poppy reruns that are like comfort food to me but to which I would never want to admit to watching in public.

5. Without looking, guess what time it is

10:00. Geez these questions are dull.

6. Now look at the clock. What is the actual time?

10:26. Dammit, I should be in bed.

Knit graffiti flags

Several months ago a friend proposed that we knit up little flags for our local park. I loved the idea and jumped on board.

Together we made about 45 little flags and I strung them together sometime in June. At the time, we were planning to hang them up for the first summer park party of the year. But the party was delayed by rain and the flags never made it up.

Finally today I got my act together and hung the flags. V helped out by lugging over our rickety ladder. He kept Miya amused on the swings while I nailed up the flags.

One of the interesting things about knit bombing is watching the reaction of people when I am putting up the installation. Some are curious and even enthused – but most are indifferent, especially today.

A man who was at the park with his son (a son old enough to play unassisted) sat and watched me the whole time I was climbing up and down the ladder stringing up the flags without once offering to help or hold the ladder. When we were leaving he said, “They look nice.” Um, thank you.

Another dad who was pushing a little girl in circles around the park just gave me a few puzzled, blank stares. Two women chatting on a park bench tossed a couple of glances my way, but otherwise ignored me.

Point taken. Seeing a woman nail knitted items to a gazebo is nothing remarkable.

My mum sent me a clip of a news story about women in Montreal who are yarn bombing their urban neighbourhoods. Maybe if I was just a little more edgy I could get some press coverage too. But I think I need to come up with something more interesting for my next project.

Maybe I need to think bigger. Continue that knitted scarf till it could drape the length of the Peace Tower. Knit a body suit for the Terry Fox statue. Knit a mock-up of the proposed development project for the convent site. Perhaps I need to be thinking in terms of life-size installations, neon colours and high-traffic locations.... I need more hours in the day.

Summer days outdoors

One of the things I love about summer is that so much of my time is spent outdoors. I’m not a huge fan of the heat, and those sweltering humid days I could definitely live without, but I do love how much of our days are spent outside the confines of four walls.

Today we spent most of the morning at a park celebrating the second birthday of one of Miya’s little friends. There was a great splash pad that the kids ran around in, lots of trees and open space. The party invite had suggested that in lieu of a bought present, guests offer the birthday girl a little rock. Miya is great fan of collecting rocks and spent quite some time mulling over the perfect one to give her little friend.

In early evening we headed to a friend’s house for a lovely backyard bbq. Well, even though the food was cooked on the bbq it was much more than the type of bbq we usually host. Our bbqs tend to be sort of haphazard get-togethers at which various things get thrown on the grill, naked children pee in paddling pools and foods are consumed at random times, often with fingers.

At this dinner party, we actually sat along a long table under a little tent, ate delicious salad, roasted eggplant, salmon and beef off real plates with real cutlery. It was absolutely lovely and reminded me of outdoor meals in Europe and of how delightful it is to eat in the open air.

Even our cats have become outdoor pets and are loving the change. Ever since the latest peeing disasters, both cats now spend as much time as they like outdoors. Our house smells better for it, and the cats are happy and contentedly tired.

It’s a nice kind of tired you get at the end of a day outside – much different from that sort of headachy, stiff tired that comes from a day spent hunched over a computer. After a day spent outdoors I feel a perfect mix of relaxed, rested and sleepy.

I am outdoors year round, but the effortlessness and ease of it during the summer is wonderful.

Breast Milk Baby

A new doll that’s coming to North America is getting a lot of negative buzz. And while I admit that the doll kind of weirds me out and I won’t be lining up to buy it for my daughter, I think the controversy over it is just as disturbing.

The doll is called “Breast Milk Baby” and, as the name suggests, it’s designed to mimic breastfeeding. Little kids playing with this doll can put on a halter top with two appliques symbolizing breasts. When the doll’s mouth is brought to the appliques, it wiggles and makes a sucking sound. Afterward, the doll cries until it is burped.

The Spanish-manufactured doll has been successfully selling in Europe for several years, but has only just debuted at a recent Los Vegas toy fair. It is supposedly meant to encourage parenting skills in young children.

The doll comes in six different combinations of race and gender – and with the requisite halter top. Apparently there are flowers for girl dolls, stars for boy dolls. What’s up with that?? A woman’s nipples do not change depending on the sex of the child she is nursing!

So while I’m all for breastfeeding and think it’s more natural to have little kids pretending to breastfeed their dolls than to give them little bottles, I do think this doll is strange. But that’s more my beef with the over-commercialization of things and the manufacturing of toys so as to prescribe the ways in which they should be played with.

But Fox News host Bill O’Reilly has declared the doll inappropriate for children and that it forces them to grow up too quickly. Obviously he has not seen toddlers imitating their parents in housecleaning, lawn mowing, dish washing and yes, caring for babies. Imitating adults is what little kids do – albeit usually with more imagination and less gimmicks.

Some critics are saying it sexualizes little girls, while others that they aren’t ready to think of their bodies as nurturing. The issues seem to be much more about the fake breasts than about the idea of a baby breastfeeding. Shameful to think we’d teach children that breasts are utilitarian and not just objects of entertainment.

Bike + thunderstorm

I experienced something new tonight – and it’s not often that I get to have a truly first-time experience these days – I biked home in the pouring rain.

I was out for dinner with a friend tonight. Before deciding to bike to meet her, I’d asked my husband if rain was forecasted. I didn’t check the forecast myself, but trusted him since he consults the radar and satellites with religious devotion. He told me the forecast was clear. So off I went with neither umbrella nor jacket.
Toward the end of our dinner I noticed a few drops on the ground. But I figured it to be a cloud burst that would blow over – and besides, it was only about a 7-minute bike ride to get back home.

Well, just as I hopped on my bike, the clouds burst. Lightning flashed and thunder rolled. The rain came in sheets that I could see crossing the street (I was almost tempted to swerve). In the short time it took me to get home, I was soaked through.
It was teeth-chattering cold, but oddly fascinating as well. I don’t have a light on my bike, so the bike path was a ribbon of blackness, with puddles faintly gleaming in the light of street lamps. Trees bent heavy with the rain leaned over me, weighed down so low that several times I had to duck to pass beneath them.

The rain was driving so hard it was almost blinding –and yet given how dark it was, that almost didn’t matter. And the feeling of getting soaked by cold, pounding rain was invigorating. But the worst was when I had to wait at the lights to cross the street only a block and a half from home. That was when I felt the coldest – standing still and being pelted by sheets of rain.

I nearly fell on the driveway as I rushed the dismount and spilled out onto the wet pavement. I didn’t bother negotiating my way to the garage, just pushed my bike into the sun porch, kicked off my soaking shoes and went for a towel.
I’m mostly dry now and headed to bed. Somehow not sleepy though.

I heart public libraries

Today on CBC’s noontime call-in show, Ontario Today, the topic was public libraries since the mayor of Toronto is proposing closing some branches and reducing hours and programming in others in an attempt to compensate for an estimated $744-million shortfall. Even Margaret Atwood has weighed in on the controversy, urging people to sign an on-line petition against cutbacks.

The call-in show was asking if and how people use their libraries. The guests on hand talked up the services libraries offer – like free downloads, e-books, internet, etc. In fact they seemed to be doing their best to not talk about books – as if ‘books’ is the old image that the library is trying to break with. Chat up wine tastings and citizenship ceremonies. Make the libraries sound cool. The underlying message was that books are just not hip enough to draw the public in.

As a book lover, I found this all a bit sad. And let me add that when I say I love books, I love print books. I love the paper and covers. I like holding a book, feeling the weight of it. (V however keeps complaining that he should be reading the latest George R.R. Martin release on an e-book since he’s nearly dropped the 1,000+ page hardcover book on his face a couple times when reading late at night.)

I think libraries should embrace their bookness. Sure, it’s great to offer internet and making your own baby food classes, but libraries are essentially about printed books. Stats even show that the borrowing of e-titles represents only 0.8% of overall circulation.

I know I’m a bit archaic when it comes to these matters, given that I’m a fan of such things as printed books and old-fashioned letters, but now that I have a young reader at home, I’ve become even more of a library fan. A trip to the library is a special outing, complete with snacks, coloring, puzzling… and of course, the choice of new books to take home. Thanks to the children’s section of our library I have become somewhat of an expert on penguins, pikas and construction trucks.

So yes, I’m all for finding ways to support public libraries.

Crime rates steadily falling

The next time you hear a politician claiming that the reason we need to invest billions of dollars into building more prisons and warehousing more people within them, please bear in mind a recent report from Statistics Canada which shows that crime rates continued their long-term downward trend in 2010.

Crime rates have been falling steadily for the past 20 years. The majority of the decline last year was in property crimes like break-ins and car theft. Decreases were also reported in many offences such as homicide and serious assault. The index measuring the severity of crime also fell by 6% to its lowest point since 1998 when the index was first available.

Our national rate of homicide is 1.62 per 100,000. While it’s very hard to make international comparisons about homicide due to variances in reporting, categorizing, etc. as a rough point of comparison I would like to point out that homicide rates, according to Wikipedia, in some other countries of the world: Honduras, 77; El Salvador, 70; Colombia, 32; Brazil, 25; Mexico, 18; America, 5.

Some types of crime did increase last year, such as child pornography, sexual assault, criminal harassment and drug offences (about half of which were for pot possession). However, most crimes are non-violent (4 out of 5 offences). And almost 2/3 non-violent offences are minor (theft under $5,000, mischief and break-ins).

Also contrary to the fear rhetoric of politicians, Toronto has one of the lowest crime severity index reports of Canada’s cities (the lowest being Guelph, followed by Quebec, Toronto and Ottawa). And despite the image often portrayed of violent youth gangs holding our cities hostage, youth crime rates have declined by 7%. And yet the federal government is seeking to substantially harden the Youth Criminal Justice Act.

Despite this steady decline in crime rates, the Canadian prison population is expected to grow by 4,500 inmates by 2014 – not because crime rates are going to suddenly reverse their trend, but because the Conservatives are continually changing legislation so as to send more people to a jail for longer periods. Since 2006-07 when the Tories came to power, spending on Corrections has increased by 80%.

Have they imprisoned logic too?

Email Charter

As a daily blogger, it’s ironic that I complain about time I spend in front of the computer and on-line. And yet I do. I know though that I’m lucky enough to not be in the predicament of some friends who open their work email to be greeted with 50+ messages. My inbox is relatively small. Yet I still spend many hours each week opening, reading, and replying to email.

So when I noticed on the Q blog that there had been a recent conversation with TED conference curator Chris Anderson about a proposed Email Charter, I tuned in.

Anderson argues that email is terribly inefficient and stressful. The problem, he says, is that it takes less time to send an email than it does to respond to it – i.e. multiple recipients, added links, attachments, etc.

Following a popular on-line discussion about this problem, Anderson has created an email charter, as a way to tackle this “tragedy of the commons”.

His first rule: Respect Recipients’ Time. He’s advocating for clarity and brevity, although the point is not necessarily to always write shorter emails, but to write emails so that they can be responded to quickly.

My favourite rule is #5 - Slash Surplus cc’s. While acknowledging that cc’s can be useful and even efficient, they get used far too often. I think people often do it to cover their butts, to needlessly keep everyone in the loop. How did offices function before email? Did we have to inform our colleagues and managers of every decision, every conversation? Let’s keep our own records and save the cc’s for when it really counts.

Another great idea from the charter: use EOM and NNTR. EOM – end of message – is for brief messages that can be sent in the subject line followed by EOM, letting the recipient know they don’t have to open the email. NNTR – no need to reply – can hopefully shorten some needlessly long email chains.

Email has been around for about 30 years, and has been popular for about 20. Is it too late to change? Perhaps. But then again, technology is all about reinventing itself. Maybe it is time we reinvent how we use email.

#9: Blog about our cat, Bacall

V had asked me to write about one of our cats. I think at the time he was just hoping for some sort of sacrilegious parody – what with his ‘Pope Pointyface’ bit.

But the tale I will tell is not a farce – it is a sad tale of inappropriate urination and costly veterinary bills.

Back during the whole Ssscat episode, Bacall expressed her displeasure by peeing on things in the living room, right in front of us. She peed on my book bag and on a few other things left lying on the floor.

I turned off the Ssscat and Bacall stopped her protest.

But a few days ago, she started peeing upstairs again – and now she was not limiting herself to items left lying on the floor (as if criticizing our lack of tidiness). She peed in Miya’s toy box, on a pillow, on my bags, in a vent... She even peed on M’s change pad and V did not notice until after laying M on it and coating our daughter’s hair in piss.

And this wasn’t any old cat pee Bacall was so liberally sowing – this was dark, extra-stinky pee. On Sunday morning (the day of pee-in-the-hair) I decided Bacall had earned herself the privilege of being an outdoor cat and she spent much the day outside, despite her protests. (Bogey was quite happy to join her though and didn’t come home till midnight, the rogue).

V did some internet browsing and came up with suggestion that Bacall might have a urinary tract infection. He convinced me to take her to the vet, so today I packed up Bacall in her crate and carted her to the vet. She did not like the trip and peed her displeasure and fear, so I did not have to explain that my cat’s pee is extra stinky.

But of course she would not pee on command (do any cats?) for them to test her urine – and so we paid $70 for a consult, $48 for IV fluids, then $100 for collection and analysis of pee. Seems she does indeed have an infection – so now we have 2 weeks of antibiotics ($30). This is some expensive pee!

Famine in East Africa

A massive humanitarian crisis is currently threatening the lives of 10 million people in East Africa. Famine has already killed tens of thousands – and more people are dying each day. An estimated 2.2 million people have been cut off from emergency aid due to militant control of some areas.

A perfect storm of drought (the worst in 60 years), war, and rising commodity prices (the price of some staples has increased by as much as 240%) has created what is being called the worst hunger emergency in a generation.

In Somalia, there are areas in which more than half the children are severely malnourished and one-in-three could die. As a parent, these kinds of statistics mean more to me than they used to. I can’t imagine watching my daughter die of starvation before my eyes and being unable to feed her. I can’t imagine what that does to someone.

The United Nations (UN) estimates that they need $300 million to prevent the famine from spreading, and another $1.6 billion to sustain essential regional programs. Top priorities are clean water and food, in addition to bore holes for wells and the establishment of feeding centres with medical supplies. The main drought refugee camp in Kenya, a facility designed for 90,000, is overflowing with 400,000 desperately hungry refugees.

But the desperately needed donations are simply not manifesting. There are financial problems in Europe and America, as well as donor fatigue from the recent crises of Haiti, Pakistan, Japan, etc.

The question is, how many people is the world willing to watch die before they start to act? Well, perhaps that’s the problem, they are oceans away from most of us, so we don’t actually have to watch the children who are too weak to cry, the mothers who are unable to nurse their infants, humans and animals turned skeletal by malnourishment.

But societies are crumbling and tens of thousands are dying. At what point do we say enough is enough?

Between July 6 and Sept 16, the Canadian government will match every dollar donated to Canadian charities like the Canadian Red Cross, Oxfam Canada, Doctors without Borders and the Mennonite Central Committee, Word Vision Canada and UNICEF Canada.

Jesus Christ Superstar

Music is such a big part of the teenage years for most of us. I remember being enamoured with pop radio and one year writing down the name of each song on the top 100 count down. I had posters of music artists on my walls, memorized lyrics of sappy love songs (although I remember being vaguely aware that these songs were expressing things that were still beyond me).

But I also remember sitting in the dark in the living room, listening to some of my the LPs from my parents’ collection. Aretha Franklin, Roberta Flack, Simon and Garfunkel, Mamas and the Papas. And these are the albums and artists that have stayed with me over the years, unlike the one-hit wonders like Tiffany or the soundtrack to Dirty Dancing.

Tonight, when I found out that Jesus Christ Superstar is playing at Stratford this summer, I had again a flashback to my youth. My parents had the original 1970’s recording of this Andrew Lloyd Webber and Tim Rice Rock-Opera production. I don’t remember how long it was – but it was several records all together.

There were certain songs I liked to listen to from time to time (i.e. ‘I don’t know how to love him’) but every now and then I would listen to it all from start to finish. I was a kid who had been raised on the Bible and I knew the Scripture’s version of the Crucifixion – so perhaps there was some teenaged rebellious part of me that like the irreverent take on some aspects of the story. But my teenage heart was also moved by the poetry and passion of the lyrics and the music. And it’s not exactly sacrilegious – just not the Sunday School version of the story.

And now I’m itching to head down to Stratford to actually see this rock-opera that I’ve only ever listened to (although thanks to YouTube I can now see some movie clips). I’ve never been to Stratford either, although I’ve often wanted to go. Funny, as someone who loves Shakespeare, you would think that would have been the draw... but there are always opportunities to see Shakespeare – this would be a rare treat.

Beating the heat

We’re sweltering here in Ontario this week, as are many across North America as a massive dome of heat sits above us. Last night I stepped outside at 10 p.m. and it felt like the heat of the tropics. Sticky, humid and hot.

I’ve lived in hot places before, but have gotten used to the temperate weather here in Ottawa. So it’s a bit of an adjustment to deal with temperatures above 40˚ (counting humidex). I’m trying not to complain, but I am looking for ways to stay cool. We’re certainly spending lots of time in air conditioned museums and as little as possible outdoors during the heat of day.

While there are some long-term solutions for keeping cool, like planting trees around our home, improving home insulation, and adding ceiling fans... I’ve been gathering some tips for beating the summer heat which I thought I might share here.

1) Draw the curtains, pull down the shade, close the blinds... it makes the house seem dim but helps to keep some of the sun’s heat outside. Putting up a reflector shield in the car’s windshield can also really make a difference.

2) Stay hydrated – lots of water and cold drinks (they say to avoid caffeine and alcohol, but that’s not much fun).

3) Lower the humidity in your home by turning on a dehumidifier, drying clothes outside, or using the bbq. A heat wave is a good excuse to avoid cooking by eating cold meals or getting take out.

4) Have a cold shower. I gasp as I step into an icy shower, but it feels so refreshing once I get used to it! Added bonuses of less steam in the bathroom and a lower energy demand.

5) Put a bowl of ice in front of a fan.

6) The shade of trees is much cooler than the shade of buildings, so if you have to be outdoors, seek shelter under trees. Big hats help too.

7) Head for the nearest pool – or even stay home, fill the paddling pool, put up the patio umbrella and pull up some chairs. Add kids and feet to water, and garnish with some cold drinks and watermelon slices.

Uncovered poetry: Monkeys and Angels

It’s not all that late, but I’m all that tired. So tonight I submit some more of my odd poems. Reading these poems again now is strange to me, my game of metaphors obscured by time.

Monkey Tongue

Words are like problems we never solved;
like the five-year-old monkey that lives in my mouth
whose shit on my tongue is bitter, the smell of damp fur musty and dark.
His tight black fingers pinch my teeth and his whimpering
wakes me each dawn,
a helpless moaning that tastes like desperation.

His name is Bob Transcending
he moved here from Trafalgar Square,
it’s not in my mouth that he lives,
but further in my belly somewhere.

I don’t believe you saw an angel when we climbed onto the roof last night,
your coat hunched over your shoulders so its wings could drive clouds from the moon.
‘This gets my mojo hummin’’ you shouted from your perch,
the crumbling chimney of archetype silhouetted against your back
like Michael’s sword come to bless and comfort you.
This before you leaped to the church tower and hung on its heavy bell,
its pendulum swinging you side to side like Natalie’s pen in her restless hand.

When you will swing next and the monkey rise to meet you,
I will swallow for the very first time,
tasting my own baked saliva on my wet furry tongue.
I am no mother’s appendix, my feet are yet unclean.
The bell replies no
and the monkey’s shit unraveling.


God’s Angels, Priority Post

The pin-head dancing angels delivered by the post

startle you when you open the letter,
spray jasmine scented dust that makes you sneeze.
The return address reads: God Almighty, Belfast

but the street name is smudged illegible
and you haven’t really opened it yet.

In your moment of hesitation,
She reaches through the mail slot
and plucks the letter from your hands,
so that you will not be blinded
by the glory of God and her dancing minions.

Thus the prayer will rise, disillusioned,
recalling the unopened letter
lost from beaded fingers unclasped.
And you, crying in incompletion,
are left longing for the angels
snatched back by a jealous hand.

Google scares me

What is it about this new Google+ that has even my husband onboard (he and around 18 million early users)? V, one of the most cautious, internet-security buffs I know, was the one who invited me to Google+. Why should I join? I asked the man who has refused Facebook and generally snubs social media.

He argued that Google+ has better privacy settings and controls. And there's the supposedly the big appeal of Google+ – their fancy-looking ‘circles’ which allow you to categorize your contacts into circles like friends, family, work colleagues, acquaintances. You can then decide who, in these categories, can see what you’ve posted.

(Google+ says, ‘not to worry, your contacts won’t know what circle you’ve placed them in.’ Just make sure to not post something too gossip-worthy for one circle since a ‘friend’ might mention it to a mere ‘acquaintance’ – thereby revealing to said acquaintance what esteem they have in your eyes.)

So my curiosity temporarily got the best of me and I opened a Google+ account. I closed it within a few hours – after some momentary panic when I read that if you try to close Goggle+ you will lose all other Google services like Gmail and this blogging service. Perhaps my house would cease to exist on the map.

Not surprisingly, it’s also rather hard to find good answers when you do a Google search for ‘close Google+ account’. And the Google+ help centre isn’t much better.

Thankfully Bing found me helpful video on youtube that showed me how easy it actually is to remove the + but keep the Google. But my relationship with Google has been soured by this experience.

I already depend on Google for my email, my calendar, maps, blogging... their creepy little virtual fingers seem to be reaching further and further into my life.

I often have the desire to completely unplug from the Internet – this desire has been bolstered by these months of daily blogging. I would rather invest in face-time than screen-time.

The last thing we need is another timewaster that draws personal information out of us and tricks us into thinking we are more social after spending more time alone with our computers.

I trust you

The first time I went on the pilgrimage to Santiago de Compostela, I encountered a profound life lesson, that of learning to accept help from others, to be vulnerable and, overall, to move from my preferred state of solitary independence to one of integrated community.

I have continued to learn, being repeatedly taught through life’s encounters and circumstances, that life is best lived with trust and faith, that believing in the best in others is ultimately uplifting.

I have come to enjoy, and even to value, being someone who tries to assume the best of others, not the worst. Sure, this means that I have been, at times, taken advantage of. A guy showed up after a huge snow storm offering to shovel our driveway and walk. I paid him up front and he left after only doing the walkway. Another time, I nearly let some scam company lock us into an expensive energy deal.

Each time I’ve had such encounters, I make a note that I should be more cautious. But at the same time, I try to resist actually changing how I see other people. Sure, I know that anything that sounds too good to be true obviously is, and to report as spam any emails I get asking me to write back quickly because one of their clients with the same last name as mine just left a large pile of unclaimed money!!

But when someone says, ‘I can keep an eye on that for you while you run in’, I like the feeling it gives me to trust that person. I like putting my trust in a stranger, in this community we have suddenly created together, and honour that with my confidence. It makes me feel part of something bigger than myself. Makes me feel good about the place I live, the people who live around me. To me, these feelings are worth a moderate risk (i.e. sure, you can watch my bag of groceries, but I’ll take my daughter with me).

So when situations arise when I am reminded of the need for caution, to get everything in writing... I feel a loss much greater than the circumstance at hand.

Bring back the handkerchief

Mistakenly thinking that today was International Ice Cream Day (when in fact the third Sunday in July is America’s National Ice Cream Day), I bought V some Häagen-Dazs. I missed the festival, but the ice cream was still tasty. This also got me thinking how smart it would be to lobby the government for a national day for your product.

Someday, perhaps, there will be an international handkerchief day. Once I’m the highly-placed distributor and promoter of handkerchiefs, I may even lobby for it.

You see, bringing back the handkerchief, or hanky as it’s more affectionately known, is one of my life plans. It should have been on my bucket list, or even on my high school yearbook: Anita will bring back the handkerchief (instead it said something about planning to work with deaf children - which didn’t quite come about).

Why the hanky, you may ask?

1) It is environmentally friendly. If people are willing to use cloth diapers on poopy baby bums, I don’t think blowing their noses in cotton squares should be a stretch. Unlike dirty diapers, used hankies don’t stink and can be tossed in the wash on any old cycle.

Also, think of all the trees that are felled and the chemicals used to bleach and soften tissues so we can fill them with our snot and toss them in landfills. Then there are the boxes and plastics which package the tissues, the transportation to stock them at local stores... Switching to reusable cloth hankies could be your gift to Mother Nature this year, and to our future generations.

2) Hankies have much more personality than a bleached box of tissues. We used hankies all the time when I was a kid, and I remember the big plaid ones my dad and other men used, the smaller white ones my mother had, and the more colourful, patterned ones my sister and I used. I learned to iron with hankies. My friends and I embroidered little flowers on them. Hankies can be monogrammed, personalized, stylized. They have flair.

Have I convinced you? Get in touch – I have a bag full of hankies from India and am looking to seed the market...

Summer storms

A storm blew through Ottawa tonight with wind speeds up to 90 kilometres an hour – ripping leaves and branches off trees and collapsing the main stage at Bluesfest.

We’ve been melting in a heat wave these last few days - so the cool air the storm brought is welcome. Temperatures at Ottawa airport dropped by 12 degrees in roughly an hour.

We’re a big fan of thunderstorms at our place. We have a big window in the living room at which we will sit and watch the storm blow through. Tonight the cats nervously joined us, twitching as leaves and debris were being tossed around. If I catch a flash of lightening, I’ll tell Miya that thunder is coming and she eagerly waits for it, then imitates the rumble or jumps around with excitement.

Only once was she really startled by a storm, and that was mostly due to me. We were walking back from the park since the sky had suddenly clouded over and the winds picked up. I was carrying her on my shoulders when a clap of thunder burst right above our heads. I jumped – so M was startled both by the loud noise and my reaction.

I lifted her down and carried her the rest of the way, trying to make up for my show of fright by admiring the thunder that continued to rumble all around us. Often when she hears a particularly loud or drawn out thunder roll she’ll say seriously, “that’s pretty cool.”

I’ve always loved storms, even when I’ve been caught out in them. Although I’ve had some close calls with lightening on some canoe trips and have a healthy respect for the potentially destructive power of nature, I love watching the sky churn with dark clouds and wind, the trees bend with the invisible force, the driving rain...

I love how a storm changes and progresses – the winds of warning which come before, that momentarily lull before the first hard and sudden bursts of rain. Some storms settle down and stay awhile, soaking the ground and over-flowing drains and sewers. Others blow through so fast that a few hours later it almost seems like nothing happened.

#15 Blog about the cognitive capability of insect swarms.

The request was that I blog about the cognitive capabilities of insect swarms, which, I’ve discovred, is also known as ‘swarm intelligence’ (SI). I thought this was a facetious request at first, but not only have I found out such intelligence exists, it’s also long been a subject of intense study by biologists, mathematicians and others.

Swarm intelligence is when group acts “to solve a problem collectively, in a way that individuals cannot”. Essentially, SI means that without centralized control, interactions between individuals cause a sort of ‘intelligent’ behaviour beyond that of which individual would be capable.

Problems SI can solve include such things as where to find food. A sudden shift in direction by a swarm has been attributed to small errors adding up to big change – sort of a tipping point being reached, I guess.

Natural examples of SI include bird flocking, animal herding, bacterial growth, and fish schooling. Insects which move in swarms include: locusts, midges, mosquitoes, bees, ants, butterflies, milk bugs, gnats and termites.

Knowledge gained from studying SI is being studied for such things as cancer treatment and the development of artificial intelligence. It’s even been used in films, such as creating battle scenes (Lord of the Rings) or structuring behaviour (the Borg in Star Trek).

There are many mathematical models out there which are based upon swarm intelligence. But I admit that, given the scope of this blog, the hour of night and my waning interest in the minutia of details about swarm math models, I cannot understand nor explain them.

I content myself to relay what one blogger identified as the five most dangerous insect swarms in the world – all of which are dangerous not because each individual is so threatening, but because these insects act tenaciously en masse. The top five are: 5) locusts; 4) fire ants; 3) yellow jacket wasps; 2) army ants; 1) killer bees.

I will also note that there are some pictures on the Christian Science Monitor site of insect swarms that might make your skin crawl a little.

And as a point to ponder, I wonder how SI could relate to Jung’s theories of collective unconsciousness. Now that’s something I’m interested in...

Reading...

I’ve been talking books tonight with V, a conversation that is now spilling over into my blog.

At any given moment, I am likely to be part-way through at least half a dozen books. For example, right now I’m reading: The Sacrifice by Adele Wiseman, Selected Letters of Margaret Laurence and Adele Wiseman, Iris and the Friends by John Bayley, Connected Parenting by Jennifer Kolari and The No-Cry Potty Training Solution by Elizabeth Pantley.

I’m looking to add a French book to the mix, so tonight V is browsing the web and tossing out random suggestions at me.

We have three different bookshelves in our living room. The biggest one, which dominates one wall, is filled with a random selection of books from V’s and my combined libraries. This is an eclectic mix of poetry, Shakespeare, cognitive philosophy, travel books, pop-sci and sci-fi, among others. Another bookshelf, one which was given to me by my mother about 15 years ago and which has traveled with me across the country, is stocked with some of my classics (Dickens, Dostoyevsky, Conrad, Joyce...), philosophy and French lit.

The smallest, but the most cluttered bookshelf, is mostly filled with books both V and I have acquired and mean to get to at some point, but just haven’t quite got around to it yet. V keeps up a steady stream of books-on-hold from the public library and is usually racing to finish one before it’s due back – so he doesn’t have the time to read any of the books he actually owns. (The long-awaited A Dance with Dragons arrived Wednesday and V fell asleep a few pages in last night). I tend to read so many books at one time that to actually finish any one in particular takes much longer than it would if I just read it on its own.

Despite my acknowledgement that I read too many books at once, I’m actually looking for suggestions of good books from any readers out there – would be particularly interested in books in French and books by Canadian authors. I like rich narratives that focus more on the subtleties and complexities of relationships than on action and plot. Feedback welcome.

Toddler art

There is something so absolutely refreshing about doing arts and crafts with a two-year old. It is completely about the process, without any judgement on the outcome.

This freedom is something we lose early on and may spend a lifetime trying to get back.

When Miya draws, paints, glues, etc. it seems to be for the sheer fun of it. There seem to be no concerns about whether a line is correctly drawn, whether the chosen colour is the ‘right one’. She has fun experimenting with colour and things like glue, glitter, stickers, etc.

And while to many the outcome may just look like the scribbles of a toddler, it is exactly this that I find so fabulous about them. Once she starts actually trying to draw houses, trees, people, cats, flowers... well, then we’ll be moving toward judgement. She’ll begin questioning whether what she did reflects what she was aiming for. She’ll start comparing the house she drew to the house the kid next to her drew. She’ll learn that grass is green and the sky is blue and that she’s supposed to colour within the lines. How can I help her hang on to making art just for the pleasure of putting colour on paper?

Generally, we’ve been working hard to avoid that instinctive ‘good job!’ for everything our child does. I hear kids being praised all the time for standing, for drinking water, for splashing in the pool, for going down the slide... We’d like to encourage our daughter to do such things for her own reasons, or do them simply because they are normal things to do, not so that she will receive our approval or praise.

This is especially true when it comes to arts and crafts; we’re being very careful to not put our own judgement on the things she does (that’s beautiful!) or to suggest that art is a chore to be done for approval (good work!).

There is going to be enough time ahead for judgment and competition. Right now I’m doing all I can to hold on the glorious freedom I see in her when she bangs away with her markers and splashes with her paints.